An elderly man in Miami calls his son in NY and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother & I are divorcing. 50 years of misery is enough.”
“Pop, what are you talking about?” the son screams.
“We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the old man says. “We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago & tell her,” and he hangs up.
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who shouts. “Like heck they’re getting divorced. I’ll take care of this.” She calls her father immediately & screams at him, “You’re NOT getting divorced! Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling back my brother & we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?” & hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone & turns to his wife. “Okay, it worked” he says. "They’re coming here for Thanksgiving but I don’t know what to do about Christmas!”