@Price Performer - what does ddh stand for?
Damn Door Hugger!
The Flight Crew
The airliner pushed back from the gate;
the flight attendant gave the passengers the usual
information regarding seat belts, etc .
Finally, she said, ‘Now sit back and enjoy your trip
while your captain, Judith Campbell,
and crew take you safely to your destination.’
Ed, sitting in the eighth row, thought to himself,
‘Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman?’
When the attendant came by with the drink cart
he said, ‘Did I understand you right?
Is the captain a woman?’
‘Yes,’ said the attendant,
‘In fact, this entire crew is female.’
‘My Goodness’ said Ed,
‘I’d better have two scotch and sodas.
I don’t know what to think
with only women up there in the cockpit.’
‘That’s another thing sir,’ said the attendant,
‘We No Longer Call It The Cock Pit.’
‘It’s The Box Office.’
Good one KC!
Thanks. I started a humor thread on the old US Aviation boards (now Airline forums) with that joke. It’s been out there since 2008 and has over 1,000 additions to it, although lately some have started putting political crap on it. We tried a “political humor” thread, but nobody posted to that one and it soon died. I figure that after enough unfunny political humor posts, that one will finally die as well.
An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, ‘Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?’ The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
- The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
- The bouncer is a blonde girl.
- I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
- The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
- The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?’
The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, ‘No…not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.’
This wins the thread.