A Texas cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates.
“Have you ever done anything of particular merit?” St. Peter asked.
“Well, I can think of one thing,” the cowboy offered.
“On a trip to the Black Hills in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn’t listen. So, I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker, smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground.” I yelled, “Now back off!! Or I’ll kick the heck out of all of you!!”
St. Peter was impressed. He asked, “When did this happen?”
“Just a couple of minutes ago …”
The worst part is most of them think they are passing
Biden Pardons Every Democrat in Country
I’d like to see Trump say he’ll pardon anyone for not paying income taxes over the next 4 years that supported him, including billionaires. Lefties won’t be able to bitch about it because he’s just being just like Biden.
I like children, if they’re properly cooked.
—W.C. Fields
My favorite W.C. Fields quote is “Who put pineapple juice in my pineapple juice?!”
My wife still has a set of encyclopedias in her parents basement from when she was a kid. Also a globe from the early 1970’s.
Just got some deer burger from a friend of mine, I am the only one in the house that will eat it so made some goulash with it last week
I may have outdone myself